Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Harsh Realities

I will never have size 8 feet. (Compared to the boats I lug around everyday...this is small)
I will never live up to the height on my driver's license. (I swear. I MUST have been 5'6" once.)
I will never pare down to the weight on my driver's license. (No comment)
My weather pixie dresses better than I do. And her cat seems friendlier than mine. (Wondering if there's an HTML transplant somewhere. Hmmmm)
I will never enjoy washing dishes. (And yet they still appear in my sink with disturbing regularity.)
When I'm passionate about something...I yell. (So when the oldest chicken came home yesterday and said she had to write a word for every letter of my name...and the "Y" became "Yells a lot"...I had to laugh. Football season is just a few months away, folks. I think she put "Crazy" on "C". I told her not to tell ALL my secrets.)
I will never have a landscaped yard. (As much as I covet HGTV's shows and all that pretty greenery, it isn't happening here. Couple of words for you. Cats. And Dogs. And another couple words. DESTRUCTIVE chickens. *sigh*)
I will never make all of my children happy at the same time. (I prove this on an everyday basis.)
Every time I need my bank card's on a day when I have no money, the gas tank is empty, and the trip to town is twenty miles. (This has happened four times. And yes, this was the scenario each time.)
If I want chocolate in a bad, evil way, I won't have the van. (What are the odds? I have M&M's in there right now, and I don't want them. But if they were gone, and I had no transportation, you can bet I'd have a craving.)
And my favorite right now:
I find it easier to blog than to write the last 7,000 or so words of my story. (Why? I seriously don't know. But I'm hoping that once I cleanse the brain with this cathartical blog, all will be well. Shall we all chant?)


Dawnyal said...

that was great. I enjoyed reading it. It is so true on the chocolate.

Rene said...

Yep, reality is harsh. BUT GET THOSE 7000 WORDS WRITTEN!!!!!

chryscat said...

Dawnyal: Tell me about it. I don't even want to touch it right now. I need to squirrel a bag away or something. In case of emergency cravings.
Rene: *laughing* You know, no one else yells at me like you do. I like it.
And I've already written 2000 of them today. HA!

Lyvvie said...

Perhaps you like them too much, those characters of yours, and when the last 5000 words are done, they'll be gone. Maybe this time it's just too hard to say goodbye?

I dunno. Maybe you should just eat a couple twinkies and see what the sugar rush brings.

Ugh, and the large fot thing, my feet went up a size with each pregnancy; fallen arches. So unfair. But then, super models all have long feet too. Perhaps a side-line in foot modelling is in your future?

Danica/Dream said...

Love the list!