Friday, November 21, 2008

The Sandman Sucks

I've been awake since a little after four. I didn't go to bed until 11:36 pm.
That is a NAP. That is not a night's sleep. At least, not for me.
Usually I get up, go to the bathroom, and toddle back to bed for a couple of hours to try and recuperate.
Not so much this morning. Why? Couldn't tell ya. But I'm not remotely pleased about this.

I've already warned the girls that we would not be going ANYWHERE this weekend. HA! This is due to the fact that I ran all over God's creation for my chickens last weekend. I am NOT exaggerating. Everyone had plans. Sleepovers. Movies. Shopping. Yada yada yada. *eye twitch* *eye twitch*
They ran me ragged.
So I put my foot down on their budding little plans with my directive:
Ye shall work on book reports, clean your rooms, and pester not the Mama.
Dig it?
All good.

Last night, after I worked a full day, I drove home and then drove back to town so that the chickens could visit the mall. MC plasters her face against the passenger's window and exclaims, "I'm home!" as soon as she sees the lights of the mall.
Help me.
So we bip inside. Chickens scatter. OC has a gift card. BC looks for shoes. MC has saved her money (miracle of all miracles) and is looking for shirts.
I liked to never have pried MC OUT of Rue 21.
And to top that off, there is an obnoxious little booth in the middle of the aisle where two sentries await unsuspecting shoppers and attempt to lure them into a conversation in hopes of a sale.
Pissed. Me. Off.
I almost lost it. Hard to imagine, huh? *grins*
The female accosted me on one side wanting to talk about my nails. I explain that my manner of upkeep is clipping them--while never breaking stride. Then the male stepped in my way on the way back and asks for a minute of my time.
"NO, thank you."
Kept walking.
I fairly kept it together. But I warned the chickens that the next time I shop at the mall and see either of these two twits, all bets are off. That's the warning shot.

Took Monday off since I work the Saturday after Thanksgiving. So I have a bit of a long weekend. And Monday without the chickens.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Still in the Dark

THIS is my current favorite song. I listen to it over and over and yes...OVER again. The lyrics are beautiful, and the harmony rocks.
This also goes to show that Oklahoma can produce more than simply country music. Though I do LOVE my Garth and Toby.
I picked this one from YouTube because it shows the artists' personality.


Wednesday, November 19, 2008

NaNo NoMo

I'm finished with NaNo. No, I did not write 50,000 words already. *flicking your forehead*
But I'm done.
Before there is some public outreach, let me explain.
I choose to be done. Plain and simple. This was me grasping for asskicking straws so that I would get my butt in gear and write.
Silly, silly me.
It boils down to poor timing.

It's not as if I don't want to write the book I targeted for NaNo. I do. It's the simple knowing that I'm not meant to write this one yet. I need to finish WATS and an Erotic Paranormal. I live my life in the "knowing." It's the feeling I get when I realize that my life is supposed to be a certain way. And this morning, in the shower, where I receive some of my best thoughts, it came to me.
Put NaNo away. Focus on the other two.
And it felt RIGHT.

Now. As the poster girl for changing from "Letting It Happen" to "Making It Happen", I struggled with this. By God, I could do this. Fifty thousand words in a month? Are you kidding me? I wrote 76,000 words in a month minus two days. It's doable for me. I know that.
But not NOW. Now is not the time.

I've been blue of late. Chalk it up to this time of year. I finished Earth Goddess and immediately fueled myself for at least one or two more WIP's. But I shouldn't have. Me coming off a literary high while dealing with the time of year that reminds me of my infant nephew's death, my home burning, and the worst break-up of my life--is a recipe for disaster.
When I finish a book, I want to grab the nearest keyboard and channel all that creativity back into another WIP. But eventually, I need time to regroup.
It hit me hard this time.
I am quiet.
People wonder what's going on with me.
"Crystal" and "quiet" just don't jibe in the same sentence. *smile*
But I need the time to center myself and sort through my projects while still doing research, working, and being the Mama Taxi to my chickens. Then there's projects for school, the holidays, and cooking Thanksgiving Dinner for the family.
I've simply gone inside for awhile.
The good news is that I've stopped the backslide. I feel my batteries recharging and gearing up for the writing.
I simmer while my mind is a million miles away sorting out thoughts and plots.
That's why I'm quiet.
For now.
Don't get used to it.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Live, Learn, Love

you were a dream
i had to let go
hopes of my heart
torn from my soul

you took the light
that together we made
left me in darkness
to shame and degrade

you hurt me but
didn't break me inside
smothered my spirit
watched as i died

you didn't notice the ember
a small flickering light
hope burned anew
i held on so tight

and now a new warmth
mending my soul
taking the pieces
making them whole

so you were a dream
i had to let go
through the pain i survived
a new love to show

Blah blah blah

That would be the summation of pretty much everything at this juncture.

I feel like hammered dog crap. That, in itself, certainly isn't conducive to working on NaNoWriMo (eh...under 4000 words so far). It doesn't lend a helping hand for me to ambitiously tackle any other writing project. Hell, I don't even want to get dressed in the morning.
I'm exhausted.
However, knowing myself as I do, this will change. When...would be the kicker. Hopefully soon. So I will blather on about what's going on in my neck of the woods.

Welcome to those who have decided to chance upon my blog and read the ramblings of a quixotic mind. *waving*
Everyone's welcome here. Well, almost everyone. If you're peddling Viagra or something of the sort, you may pass on quietly and take your faux blue pills with you.
I'll be reading the new Christine Feehan book. And also, the new Chelsea Handler. I'll more than likely buy Twilight this weekend because I plan on reading it before I watch it at the movies. THIS is what you get when you have chickens in the house. They dictate what I will have to watch at the theater more often than not. I did, however, get out of watching House Bunny.
I don't watch much reality tv. I think most of it blows. It seems to bring out the REALLY unattractive (re: scheming, manipulative, fucked-up) side of people. I do enjoy The Biggest Loser, though. Or I did. Until this season.
Keep in mind, I have only missed one season. I like to watch the whole transformation of person. It's great. And the finale where you can really see the difference is inspiring.
Bob and Jillian are fantastic. And the contestants are usually personable enough that viewers root for them.
However, there is a bitch from hell this season. And cohort bitch. Really??? They couldn't just have one? Do they do a damn PSYCH eval before casting this show? And if not, then they should seriously look into that.
Vicky is a pathetic, whining, manipulative bitch from hell who makes me want to bitch slap her. There is no redeeming value whatsoever in her. I feel pity for her children, family, and anyone else that happens to be breathing the same air as she does. She's a waste of space. And certainly a waste of my two-hour viewing time.
Heba is quite hideous, too. She must be the center of attention. And if she's not, God forbid, then she draws it back to her. She has a large mouth with very little sense. A great sense of self-importance with no scruples and negligible intelligence.
Both are arrogant and nauseating. These two are ugly on the inside. Too bad Biggest Loser doesn't do personality transplants.
*deep breath*
That's been lurking for awhile. But I didn't want to waste a whole blog about what pathetic pieces of shit they are. Just a couple of paragraphs.
Onwards and upwards.
I have received most of the Christmas list for chickens. That's a good thing. Now we shall see if Santa delivers coal, or if he'll come through with art sets and clothes and minutes for phones. He's pretty good like that.
I shall ask for sanity. But considering my track record, I may as well plan for coal.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Well. That was unexpected.

It seems that the further I ease into the Fall/Winter season, the crankier I become. Maybe I have that seasonal disorder. *shrug*
So I thought that I would break out the Tae-Bo tape, let Billy Blanks whip my ass, and then maybe have a bit of energy and a better attitude.
I actually did the DVD Sunday in the afternoon. The chickens were messing around in one of the bedrooms, and I told OC to totally ignore the heavy breathing and blatant cursing coming from the living room. But if either of these stopped--to call 911.
She agreed.
So I did the whole damn DVD. Wasn't that bad. And so, in my infinite all-or-nothing personality wisdom, I decided I would get up an hour early Monday morning and continue the trend.
Keep in mind, I always told myself that I would do this only to smack the hell out of my alarm clock, reset it, and continue to sleep.
I would make it happen this time.
Monday morning rolls around, the alarms goes off, I struggle to a sitting position and turn off the alarm. A new sense of purpose rose in me. By God!!! This WOULD be the morning I'd actually do the damn DVD to start my day.
I got up, changed my clothes, and proceeded to the living room.
Forty minutes later, OC stumbles out of her room and raises her eyebrow. "What are you DOING?" she asks with a glance at the television screen.
"Exercising," I squeeze out between asthmatic-sounding puffs.
"Psycho," she mutters and proceeds to take her early morning shower.
I finish the DVD. Do a quick "Rocky" dance. Take my own shower. Start my day.

I felt. Like. Shit.
From about ten o'clock on. Screw a bunch of those perky pain in the ass exercisers who get up at the buttcrack of dawn. YOU'RE the psychos. That's all I'm saying. In fact, I haven't felt that bad in I don't know when.
Obviously, my biorhythms or genetic make-up prohibits me from pulling this again.
I DRUG myself home last night and freaking collapsed on the couch in the living room. I wasn't sore. I was tired and apathetic.
Wasn't pretty, my friends.
So no pre-dawn exercising for me. All my best intentions...blown to hell by feeling utterly like shit when I followed through.
Lesson learned.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Red and blue make purple

I hate politics. I hate the dirty underhanded bullshit some politicians pull in the name of whatever it is they tell themselves. So I'm highly glad that the races are over (including the local stuff), and we can move on.
Or so I thought.
I watch KFOR here. It's the NBC Affiliate. First of all, BOTH major news anchors were sure to wear their lovely red outfits for the voting night newscast. *eye roll* Not so subtle. And then they referred to the democratic party as "those democrats." Me=not stupid. But neither am I pleased at this point in time.
And apparently (this was included in LAST night's newscast) Oklahoma was the ONLY state in the Union where ALL the counties voted for McCain.
I'm registered Democrat. I voted Democrat.
And as I looked at the polling places here in town, it wasn't like it was a freaking blowout. Not hardly. There were a lot of close races.
So I have GOT to take a stand on this one and simply say...Who gives a DAMN if some of Oklahoma's population voted for McCain? Who gives a flying hell if he won all 77 counties?
The race is OVER. *tapping screen* Ya hear me???
Obama is President Elect.
Deal with it.
And the red and blue make purple?
That's this blue girl in a red state having a fit of apoplexy.
Thank you for your support.
I'm Crystal Inman, and I approve this message.

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow

Ya know, I'm not much for cloning. But I could certainly use about three of me this weekend.

I had yesterday off, and so did the girls. I hear Fate laughing now.
So off we go to shop and pay bills and ogle hot people and yell out the window at passersby and crank the radio so loud the van vibrated and walk roughly sixteen hundred miles at the local mall.
I had the first two on my list. Apparently the girls covered the rest of them.
Let's just say it was a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG day. Because just when we finished shopping, it was time to head back to the house to ready ourselves for the school's Fall Carnival.
And when we finished getting ready, off to the school we went. Now. The school is a small one. Which I like and dislike. And the Fall Carnival is always held in the Ag Building. If you have NO idea what an Ag Building no further. You'll have no idea what the hell I'm talking about for the next couple of paragraphs.
We arrive early. Because the chickens are all about getting there early and then promptly checking everyone else out. There were hardly ANY kids dressed up. SERIOUSLY~!
The girls became disillusioned, and I was irritated. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
But I sucked it up and moved on. The carnival started at 6:30 pm. Supposed to end at 9:30 pm, I believe.
But I had to leave around nine and take MC to a friend's house to spend the night for a Halloween party. So I leave OC and BC there and shuffle off MC into the night. Then I head BACK to the glorious Ag building to watch the heiney end of the festivities and prepare for clean-up.
Let me explain something. ALL monies raised from the carnival go to the separate classes for their collective hallowed Senior Trip. That's all good. So everyone is supposed to participate. I get that.
But BC signed up for (or was signed up for-stories vary) the clean-up shift.
I WORK Saturday. And wait! Not only that...I have to go in early because I have to leave work at take Oldest Chicken back to the college so she can get on a bus and go to Dallas to check out the King Tut exhibit.
By the end of last night, I'm a tired, tired girl. But can I sleep? Oh hell no. Not to mention my room is ladybug central. But that's a blog for another time.
As for today, I had to be at work at eight so I could take time to run OC to the college. Then I had to pick up MC and bring her back with me to work. So that was my lunch. Lovely, huh? After work, we will be going grocery shopping. Then I will promptly go home and die. If I'm lucky. pft
Tomorrow will be fetching OC and hearing about her travels. God, and I KNOW there was something else. *tapping finger*
It'll come to me, I'm sure. In the dead of night when I wake with my heart pounding and fear in my eyes.
My golden lining?
I took Monday off with some Comp time. Don't think I'm not hugging THAT thought closely to my chest.