I've discovered in lo my many years that in any given group...there will be a peacemaker and a troublemaker. There are wide variances in-between, but these two will always be represented.
My baby chicken went to a birthday party/sleepover last night. And yes. There is most definitely a troublemaker in that group. She's not happy unless someone else is unhappy. And if she can say something cruel and hateful...so much the better. She's 11.
And then when I worked concession last night. At homecoming. For four hours. *ahem* Two boys (whom I ADORE) got into it right behind me. I thought they were wrestling (playing around) at first. Because one had the other in a chokehold of sorts. So I just turned around. Then the father of one of the boys came flying around the corner and broke it up.
Needless to say, I was speechless. These two are good friends. They're good kids.
When I asked around later to see why in the hell they were fighting...I heard it was over a female.
Yeah. You heard me. A female. These children are twelve. But there's a little group of girls that seems to start trouble. And isn't that ridiculous? My sixth graders have already been asked to go on dates. Let me reiterate. IN SIXTH GRADE.
I will consider letting them group date when they are fourteen. Period. And no serious one-on-one dating until they are sixteen. Does that make me a strict parent? Maybe. Will I flex on this? Not at all.
Kids are growing up faster and faster these days. It's my job to be the voice of reason. The voice in their head. WHATEVER IT TAKES! And I will. Whether they like it or not. *laughing*
But back to the group mentality.
This applies to adults, too. And that's a damn shame. I don't know what takes a person and turns them into someone who is happiest when all else are miserable. But I do my damndest to stay away from them.
The peacemaker? Sometimes me. I like to keep the peace. And I'm trying to teach my kids to do the same. However...they also know they don't have to take anything from anybody. The baby chicken informed the girl that it was too bad that the troublemaker didn't want to be at any parties that my baby was at. She was going to miss out on a lot of great parties. *grins*
10 months ago