Reeducating the chickens

I love the eighties. *sigh*
Sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll? Sure. But there were also groundbreaking movies and literature. Television that made people think. And my chickens missed all that.

So what am I doing? A little reeducation. A trip back to the eighties, if you will.
Let them watch Die Hard Saturday evening. Because, I mean, Die Hard 4 is out, and they haven't a clue who John McClane is. I remedied that. I also have Wayne's World (who doesn't like to see a pre-Shrek Mike Myers pull his underwear up his butt and walk backwards acting like a "cheeky monkey"?) Breakfast Club is on my list. Back to the Future. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. And a few others. These are classics. And I like my chickens to be well-rounded.
*grins*

Saturday was running around day. The short people and I suffered the extremely hot weather and did a bit of shopping. A trip to see my lovely sis. Then we came home and watched movies. Sunday...guess what? I WROTE! And not just a little bit. *GRINS*
Five thousand words or more on Water Goddess. One thousand words or more on a short story. Go me! Of course, then I had a headache and took it easy for the rest of the day. Read Tamora Pierce's Book One in one of her series. Have the next ones on order. I really enjoyed it. It's Young Adult fiction, but it's a good read. I find myself searching for books that are more than just the same ol' same ol'. There's nothing wrong with that, but I'm leaning towards YA fiction now. Good stuff.
Hope your Monday goes...well, goes.
Grins*

A typical evening at the homestead

The chickens and I got home last night from work. Girls are running about after we all change into our nightclothes. Then there were lively games of armwrestling and thumb wars on the living room floor. That was followed by a jaunt outside where I let my children play with eggs.
Yeah. You heard me. Play with eggs.
This all stems from when Fear Factor was on the air. And yes, weak stomach though I have, I watched it with the short people.
That morphed into Fear Factor for my children! Because yes...I have a wide sadistic streak. So I know my children's fears and weaknesses. And one of the "stunts" was eating hot dogs dipped in mayo, mustard, bbq, and something else. The last one escapes me. Anyway...oldest chicken loathes mayo. Baby chicken dislikes bbq. So it was all fun. Then we'd toss eggs to each other and see who they cracked on.
(Um...anybody calling DHS yet?)

After we broke out the eggs (literally), we stepped inside because the children were not aesthetically pleasing (nor were they fragrant) at this point in time, and they hopped in the shower. Middle chicken took the first shower and decided to shave her legs.
OK. All you females know that behind the legs is NOT the funnest place to run a razor over. It's not as bad as some...but I'm just saying. So she accidentally slices against a small mole there. I, of course, have one, too. So I'm making sympathetic sounds, and we're doctoring the area. And then Middle chicken is like...WHY in the world do I have that there? I explain that some is genetics. I have one there, too. And it's unpleasant when razor meets mole.

(At this point in time...a disclaimer. I am hell on wheels in English. But I don't have much interest in Math or Science. Ya ya. Bad, bad me. So any untruths I'm about to retell should be chalked up to my Scientific ignorance. Back to your regularly scheduled blog...)
After the genetic discussion, I explain that melatonin concentrates on some area of the bodies and darkens the pigment.
Oldest chicken pipes up, "Why does it have to concentrate on my bootay?" Because, you see, oldest chicken has a nice heart-shaped mole on one buttcheek. I apparently have one, also. (I've been told)
And so does my Mom. (Sorry, Mom. I just outed you on my blog. Love you. *grins*) You don't get to know WHICH buttcheek because we all need a little mystery in our lives. But needless to say...Middle Chicken about fell out of her chair when Oldest Chicken spoke up. Puts it all into perspective, doesn't it?
Then there came a game or sixty of tic-tac-toe. But I begged off and took my butt to bed.

It's not all fun and games. Not all the time. Nor is it the guillotine.
Just another day in the life.
Grins*

Two or three?

Bullshit. Utter bullshit.

If you're expecting only two or three characters to die in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows...you'd be dead wrong. I won't post spoilers here because I'm all about everyone reading it for him/herself. I will say that I started reading under the misconception that only a small handful of characters I've come to know and love would perish. And when I reached a fifth of the way through the book, and I was past that number...I was displeased. The displeasure built as a character I thoroughly loved and enjoyed was killed.
Picture this:
Mama and the chickens riding in the van one day heading home. I'm driving. *snickering*
Anyway...we start to discuss HP #7. And we all agree that the Triad (Harry, Hermione, and Ron) cannot die. Nope. I'm not digging that at all. And then I name three other characters I just couldn't bear to lose.
Now...picture this:
Me reading #7. It's a fight scene. Huge battle. So far...I'm almost well with those that have passed. And then it happens...one of my three passes. *snap* Just like that. And I cried. Oldest chicken who was reading on the bed (her copy) with me cries just because I do. And it royally sucks. I LOVED this character. So I've got a blinding headache because well...I don't cry pretty. And I'm dashing away tears and telling myself that Jo really just pissed me off. My heart is halfway broke. And thus the power of Potter. So just be warned...if you're mentally ticking off characters that die...you'll be going past six. Easy.

Oldest chicken made me laugh when she said she was researching a bit about the book and was worried before it's release because "British people don't care when they kill people." Lovely, huh? She's such a nut. And she's plowing through at a rapid rate of speed, also. I started at 8:30 Saturday. Finished at 4:00. Took a break for breakfast and one for lunch.

Then when I was done with Potter...went outside and mowed the lawn for a good four and a half hours. Came back in and watched the last two episodes of Dr. Who Season 2. Which, by the way, is also a tearjerker.
Sheesh!

I'm not saying don't enjoy Potter. Because it's a fantastic book. There's a lot of depth. A lot of growing up. And it's fascinating.
I wish the Epilogue would have been longer. And I sure as hell wish she would have spared that one character. But if you've stuck with Potter this long...you'll need to read it. And finally say good-bye to The Boy Who Lived.

Grins*

Biography

You know...I've written works that are over seventy thousand words long. I've compacted the gist of my story in a blurb only fifty words long. But give me a biography, and I absolutely spazz.

The Red Dirt Festival will be here in November. I'm going to have a booth and be on a Romance Panel with Merline Lovelace and Christine Rimmer. I am TOO excited!!! But guess what? I had to write a bio. And for some reason...when it comes to writing about myself...I feel like a complete twit.
Too much? Not enough? Do I sound cheesy? Good Lord! The pressure! Because I don't know how many hundreds of people are going to read this stuff at the site. *sigh* Or if they'll be thinking..."Holy cow! This chick's been sampling the sauce." *grins* Which, by the way, would probably make my biography very interesting.
Grins*

Out of sorts

I'm the type of person who will take what is said and process it over a period of time. If I have some type of discussion early in the day...you can bet I'll be going over it that night as I lay awake studying the paint patterns on my ceiling. It's grand.

So when I have a particularly important discussion early in the day...I stew over it. And since some of today's news was not good...I stew some more. So that's what I've been doing. Taking the discussion and dissecting pieces of it. Wondering if the next news I get will be worse. Probably taking on way more than I should. And it's hard.

I'm out of sorts.

Should I have said more? Did I say the right thing? Geez. I can easily drive myself stupid with this stuff. *smacking self in forehead*
And now I have someone else that didn't like the fact I had this conversation earlier. And isn't that BETTER than grand?
And yes...I'm deliberately being vague. Because this flippin' Soap Opera is my life.
*massive eye roll*
Fictional characters have it so easy.
Grins*

Quilting

I've never been good with a needle and a thread. If a button pops off...too bad for it. Really.
But now I find myself quilting. Piecing together odds and ends to make something.
Something of myself.
Something of Water Goddess.

This is wholly new and different for me. My writing has always come to me in order. But now I find myself writing scenes that just pop into my head and then putting them together later. There are whole scenes that just won't let me go. So I've taken to typing them up and then organizing later.

As for my life...I've found myself clutching mere threads more than once in my world. Straggly pieces of thin thread that's been severed. Sometimes a clean cut. Sometimes the raggedy edge. And it wears on me.
But then I sit myself down and begin to piece together what I have. To see what I need to pull the seams back together. To find the pattern that suits me. That brings out the beauty in what was left behind.
And it's long work. Tiresome work. Work that some days wears me to the bone. And when I've had enough, I set the thread down for awhile and take a deep breath. Find myself. And begin again when I can.
Because this quilt is the fabric of my life. The good. The bad. The straight stitches and the ragged seams.
And I wouldn't change the pieces I've had so far. All I can do is look ahead and do the best with what I have to work with.
That's all any of us can do.
Crystal*

A bit o' the Brit

Took the chickens and watched Harry Potter Sunday. I'd say it was the best movie yet. It stuck to the book, the true story. A lot of people like book 3 better. Followed by book 4. But those struck me (and pardon me for mixing the metaphors here) as books with ill-fitting dresses or trousers, if you prefer.


They didn't gel for me. And I didn't like the creative license that movie 3 took with book 3. It had a lot more special effects, true. But the scenery didn't mesh with what I had taken inside me from the reading.


So I'll take Order of the Phoenix and look for Half-Blood Prince to meet my expectations because the same people will be working on it.
After the movie, and a bit of shopping, we went home. Oldest chicken didn't feel well. Baby chicken went over to a friend's. So I popped in Season 2 of Dr. Who. Middle chicken and I enjoyed ourselves immensely.


Now, for those of you who have read this blog for awhile...I think Dr. Who is the perfect man. Because he's so damn imperfect. And for a bit of a dip in the Harry Potter pool...Dr. Who is played by David Tennant.


Seen here:













Also known as Barty Crouch Jr. or Bad Guy of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. And in one of the episodes I watched yesterday from last season...the man that played Barty Crouch Sr. was the bad guy. LOVE IT!

So I wrapped myself in the Brits yesterday and enjoyed every minute of it. I really must go and visit.
Grins*

Harry Potter phenomenon

Going to go check out Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix tomorrow with the chickens. Ought to be a good time. I warned them it will be dark. But they seem to be okay with that. The older two chickens have read the book. Baby chicken? Not yet. So I did some warning about Harry's punishment by Umbridge. I remember being highly pissed when I read it in the book. I really just wanted to stab her with that damn pen. *grins*

And then we're all waiting for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. *rubbing hands together*
I'm not digging this whole "three characters die" thing. But it's not my baby. It's J.K. Rowling's. So I will take the story she has written and appreciate it for what it is. But I do want to add that I may not be pleased with it. We'll see how that pans out.

I don't like main characters dying. Especially seven books in. By God! We've built a relationship. I know their likes and dislikes. They walk, talk, and breathe in my mind. So to kill them off is painful. Then again...I read somewhere that Rowling holed up in a hotel for three days and cried the entire time she finished the book.
Don't blame her a bit.
So I'll wait along with the rest of the world and hope to God that my favorites make it to an epilogue or something similar in Deathly Hallows.

As for main characters dying...I read an article about that in Romantic Times Magazine. Some writers do it as matter-of-factly as writing the "sky was blue." I couldn't. I can't. Though I may, at times, injure, torture, or maim one. *shrug* You know.
But their heart is still beating.

I tend to become highly irritated at the killing of main characters.
Your thoughts?
Grins*

So I was googling myself...

...'cause I'm a dirty, dirty girl...and what do I find?

Apparently there is a Playboy bunny out there with MY name!!! And since they don't actually employ anyone over the age of twenty or something...it was MY name first! Due to um, age difference and all that.

Now someone will google me and think I'm some chesty chick who likes whipped cream and feathers.
Oh wait.
That IS me.

Okay...some HOT chesty chick who likes whipped cream and feathers. *sigh*
What's a woman to do? And heaven forbid some yahoo googles my name looking for a little magazine action and sees pictures of me. He'll be scarred for life. Hell, I'm scarred just thinking about it.

All right. I suppose I can live with this as long as there is no livestock involved.
And if I don't get any extra sales from this...there really IS no justice.
Grins*

Rome wasn't built in a day

But I doubt they also imported each grain of sand.

I'm having difficulties getting into one of my books. I see the ending as clear as day. And I have two elements that are swimming along in my mind waiting to jump in when appropriate. But it's still rather hard.
And I'm not enjoying it. One. Little. Bit.

And then there's another book which I love. Can't wait to tap along in that one. And it's driving me nuts.
Oh wait! And then there's an Erotic Romance in which I'm targeting Ellora's Cave. And another erotic short story.

Anybody have any ibuprofen???
I'm telling ya. The party never ends here, folks.

And I can't get this line from a movie out of my head: Alcohol is a social lubricant.
Am I hooked by the term lubricant? The reference to alcohol? Don't know. But I find the sentence highly entertaining. And I'm waiting for JUST the right moment to slide that bad boy into some conversation. *grins*

Just another Manic Monday.
Grins*

Medium to well done

Took the chickens to the pool just a bit ago. We stayed for almost three hours. Then our peepers began to feel like hot little coals. So we're zipping around and will head back home in an hour or so.
Tomorrow is a work day. Gotta clean up the lovely firework paraphenalia from last night. And mow the cursed lawn. And write.
OH. YES.

Picked up the Writer's Market 2008. This book is utterly invaluable. And my stationary/office supply fetish kicks in whenever it's around. Then I post-it note to the nth power and tell myself that it's not really a sickness. Oh. And paper clips. And highlighters. *swoon* Love me a big book to play in.
If you write...you should have this. No doubt.
AND Stephen King's On Writing. You will learn more about the craft from him than just about anyone else. It's a very personal and valuable view into his mind and the craft of writing. Not to mention, it's funnier than hell. And I do mean LAUGH OUT LOUD.
Of course...if you're not much for cursing...you may want to take that sharpie and mark out all the curse words. For me? They just added the realism value.
It's as if he and I were sitting at a large lovely oak table with a fireplace crackling behind us. We sipped our drinks and mulled over the intricacies and delicacies of our writing. He, the tutor. I, the apprentice.
Good times, my friends. Good times.

Well. I've got to peel off the first two layers of skin I burned off myself and inhale some medicinal Diet Pepsi. Then I'm off to comb through my Writer's Market and tap out a few words on a couple of projects.
Hey! Somebody's gotta do it!
Grins*

Yahoo hell

Tried to access some of my email this morning, and Yahoo is acting like my ex. Uncooperative and irritating.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

So I'm piddling around with that this morning and waiting for um...five o'clock. *looking at computer screen and groaning* You know...an eternity from now.
But it IS Friday. So that's all good.
Going to drop by the grocery store after work and pick up a few things. And since it doesn't look like it will rain, the chickens and I will go swimming Saturday. Sunday looks like mowing the lawn. *GROAN*
Man, if that isn't an all day thing. Ok. Actually two. But I'll still squeeze in a bit of writing. I'm doing the Big Mull right now. You know...when you mentally sift through characters, plot, and dialogue and see which direction you're going to take.
Plot? *snort* Are you kidding me? Tried it. Thought I'd have to slit my wrist with my pen. Just doesn't quite work that way for me. The basics are fine. But I cannot and will not map down everything that happens in my stories. That is akin to shoving bamboo beneath my fingernails.
*wincing* Yeah. Hell of a visual, huh?

So, I'm off to see the Wizard. Or oil a Tinman or something.
And no. That's not nearly as kinky as it sounds.
Grins*

Mild, medium, hot

I struggle with this every time I have a new book come out. If it's hot...it shoots up on the bestseller list. The mild stuff? Not so much. And I understand why. Hell, I write HOT. I like it. But there's also a place for the milder, but still intense, love scenes.
But all of my stories compartmentalized in my wee little cranium are already classified with the appropriate level of hotness.
Anyway...such as it is. It's not going to change.

How was your Fourth? The chickens and I had a great time. Popped some fireworks. Saw a rather huge display in the nearest city. Ate chips and drank soda. I'm sure that's what our founding fathers saw when they declared our freedom from England. *nodding* Suuuuuuure it was.
Lit several smoke bombs at the house. The kittens ran for cover and wouldn't come out for an hour or two.
Almost set my baby chicken on fire. Hey! It was an accident! I swear it!!! I had two sets of these new firecrackers. Had no idea what they would do. Me=bad mama
So I light one FAR away from the chickens and myself. Doesn't do much of anything. So, in my maternal brilliance, I decide to set the other one of the sidewalk in front of the house. We're all gathered around.
I disavow all knowledge of proximity. But it was um...close. ANYWAY...lit the little sucker, and one comes flying for baby chicken like a guided missile. OMG!
Once we all realized she wasn't hurt...(AT ALL)...I almost fell on the ground laughing. That girl can MOVE! And as, once again, oxygen flowed to my brain...I apologized.
This incident ranks right up there with the time I almost got all of us hit by lightning. I'll have to pull that gem of a post out and let everyone see what my poor chickens have to put up with.

But all in all...we had a good time. And my chickens only have about six more weeks of freedom. Anyone else looking forward to the start of school? *sigh*
Grins*

My self-interview in the WCP Newsletter

Just so you don't miss anything...*grins*

WHISKEY SPOTLIGHT
Crystal Inman on her new release, Fire Goddess


Hello my lovelies! Crystal Inman here. I'm an author with Whiskey Creek Press. Kate asked if I could swing by and chit-chat a little about my books, myself, and my newest release—Fire Goddess. And since I talk to myself frequently…this should be a piece of cake.
I live in Oklahoma in the middle of nowhere with my three beautiful daughters. (I think this will come in handy when they want to date in a couple of years.) I work full-time and write for Whiskey Creek Press under this name and Whiskey Creek Press Torrid under the pen name C'ann Inman. I grew up reading romance and am beyond thrilled to be writing it.
I enjoy writing characters who feel as if they live and breathe off the pages. Because when you have days when your Weather Pixie on your blog (http://chryscat. blogspot. com) wears better clothes than you…you have to have a rich, fantasy life. And I do.
I've written several sub-genres of romance: Contemporary, Time Travel, Erotic, Fantasy and Paranormal. The Portrait, a paranormal romance, garnered four and a half stars from Romantic Times Magazine (July 2007). What He Wants, an erotic romance, has been in the Top Ten Titles for WCP Torrid for a year.
Writing and reading romance are two of my greatest pleasures. I'm all about the happily-ever- after, especially when life doesn't quite turn out the way we think it should. And doesn't that happen more often than not? And heaven knows, sometimes this is a daily occurrence. But when I can engage two or more characters in a literary dance…there is magic. And you and I are swept away to another place. Where the women give as good as they get, and the men are hotter than hot. Not a bad way to spend some time. *grin*
I developed the Guardian Goddess series from a simple premise: Every woman is a goddess. Wait! Don't choke on your drink! I'm serious. We are multi-tasking, hard-working individuals who sometimes forget about ourselves in the day-to-day we call life. Each Goddess in my books must choose a mortal to nurture, guide, and protect. And only when the four Goddesses work together and triumph, shall they move on to greater responsibility and power. And we mortals can be difficult. *laugh*
I gave each of the Goddesses an element to correspond to: Fire, Water, Wind, and Earth. And then I set about matching them up with a mortal who truly needs a Goddess. I believe you'll enjoy the results.Fire Goddess is available July 1, 2007 from Whiskey Creek Press. The incredible cover comes from Jinger Heaston, the wonderful editing by Chere Gruver. (When they say it takes a village…they aren't kidding.) And I'd like to thank both these women. But I'd also like to thank you, the reader. You inspire me to greater heights in writing. And you push me to come up with ideas and stories that that will engage us both.
************************************************************************************

What? No "R"???

Royalty resides here

Sunday was an interesting day. I wrote (about 8000 words). I split those between two different works. One that's already contracted...and um, one I can't get out of my head. *grins*
Oldest and baby chicken were reading in baby chicken's room. Both hovered over an air vent. *eye roll*
That left middle chicken at odds with the world. So what does she proceed to do?

Well...she grabs a white fitted sheet and drapes it around her neck. Then she pomps and circumstances down our long hall while looking for her "subjects." And when she finds them, she tries to "knight" them.
I. Am. Rolling.

Then...as I meander off to bed last night...what do I see?
This note on middle chicken's door: (the name has been changed to protect my royal heathen)

Do not come in! I am busy for the rest of my (Queen) life.
Middle Chicken of
Middle Chicken Land

And I thought I had it rough. LMAO

And just in case you didn't know...Fire Goddess is available NOW~! Hie thee to Whiskey Creek Press and check it out.

What else? Well...What He Wants is in the Top Ten Bestsellers for WCP Torrid for the eleventh month!!! Yay!
Makes me a happy camper, my friends.
Grins*