Thursday, May 12, 2016

I just...can't.

I work around the beloved books.  Sometimes one will catch my eye, and I'll discover a new author. LOVE when that happens.
Other times, I'll see something so outrageous or funny that it haunts me.
A couple of examples would be:  Dick and Jane and Vampires.  Her Dearly Unintended.

Now.  I thought this whole Dick, Jane, and "creatures of the night" shit was a joke.  I grew up on Dick and Jane and Spot.  They are SACRED to me.  SACRED.  So when I stumbled across this book where this bloodsucker was a misunderstood miscreant who simply wanted a friend or two, I lost my shit.  It's a children's book.  I would have found it a bit entertaining if there was an adult riff on it.  There would have been some humor in there.  This?  Not so damn much.

Came across "Her Dearly Unintended" and simply gaped at the cover.  I think it may be a Buggy/Bonnet Romance (Amish), but I'm not sure.  I'm quite sure, however, that it would be rated G or PG if such things were applicable.  Or, at least, that's what I would think before I got a good look at the cover. This girl is about to fuck some shit up.  She has a hammer and some rocks in a bucket. Say hello to your maker because your time here is through, sucker.  I think the trees behind her are where she'll hide the body.
Anyone else feeling "The Lottery"?

Book covers go through stages/phases.  I remember when all romance showed a man's pectorals. Then we moved to only legs.  The "clean" romances usually show a young woman with a pastoral backdrop looking off into the ether.  Do they all live on farms or around livestock?  Curious about this.
I watched a TED talk one time where a gentleman who spent his professional career putting together book covers for clients spoke of tying story to art.  THAT, I understand.  But if we're going to cookie cutter it, at least choose something BETTER than that instead of worse.  Put as much effort into the cover as the book.  Don't simply slap that shit together and think it will ride.
It most certainly won't.

1 comment:

Mark R Hunter said...

For some reason, I kept seeing that title as "Her Dearly Undead". Maybe that would fit the cover better?