An app that tries to kill you

I want to be a runner.
Not some long-distance marathoner all lanky and muscled with 2% body fat.
No.  I simply want to run.

Thought I'd download Couch to 5K app so I could get a hold of that.
Holy Mary, Mother of God.
I can easily walk an hour and a half on a treadmill.  I'm all sweaty and funky, but I can DO it.
I created a playlist with songs containing 123 beats per minute and had that in the background while this sadistic animated bitch with red hair told me when to brisk walk and then jog.
I  made it 12 minutes of the 20.

I'm unamused.
My body is also not laughing.

Right hip is trying to secede because she's saying she didn't sign up for this shit.  Poor girl has arthritis.  But not so debilitating that she can't run.  She just doesn't WANT to.
Neck is all stiff and out of sorts.
And the calves?
Mutiny, I tell you.

Doesn't mean I won't try again.  Simply means I need to ease into instead of cannonballing, which is my way.
Think I'll pick back up Wednesday after work.
See if I can convince myself that baby steps forward are better than sprinting and then crashing.
Wish me luck.
Grins*

Two minutes is an eternity

I'm going to finish a half marathon next year.

Take that in for a minute. I currently don't own a pair of tennis shoes and haven't since the house fire. I had to buy boots for work since it was winter. Then I bought sandals in the spring. And flip flops because they are my shoe apparel of choice.
I don't OWN tennis shoes. So that's on my to-do list.
So. What prompted this? Part is because I've recently begun talking to a friend who runs. And it sparked me. I've DREAMED of running.
But I'm not a small girl. I've got boobs and hips. I'm researching what bra to buy so that the girls don't knock me out. Ya know. And I'm reading books about training and diet and all sorts of things that I never dreamed of researching.
I am freakin' excited.
My girls are incredulous, and dare I say, non-believers.
But they should know better than to bet against the Mama.
I'm checking everything out right now. Mapping it out in my head before I lace up my nonexistent tennies. Getting a feel for it. But I'm going to do it.
Progress as it warrants.
I'm still in the planning stages.
And by the way...2 minutes is one of the first things you do when alternating between the running and walking. LOL
I used my stopwatch on my cell and almost stroked out. Who knew 120 seconds could be so long? lmao
Grins*